I recently came to the horrifying discovery that for the majority of my young adult life I have been mispronouncing "gyro" (our favorite Greek street meat). After playing the YouTube "How To Pronounce Gyro" video a couple of times and jumping up out of my seat, alarming several coworkers, I gasped aloud: How many other food words have I been so wrong about? Thus I embarked on a personal journey to right all the pronunciation-slaying I had wrought (which it turns out, had been a lot).
Ahead you will find 15 popular food words of our time. Terms that have, in one way or another, been verbally debased by us Americans to what can only be described as pure jibber-jabber. Whether you yourself have been the perpetrator, or it's been one of your parents, your boss, or your best friend, it's time to put that all behind you and move forward with confidence in ordering all the açaí bowls and charcuterie boards your heart desires.
Whenever cornered into uttering this word aloud I freeze, terrified, and something along the lines of a seagull's " caw " comes out.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Guh not gah! Let’s all say it together.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Each time someone orders a poke (as in "Don't poke me on Facebook!") bowl, an ahi tuna dies in vain.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
My best friend from college studied abroad in Italy — and when she returned, she tried to warn me. But I was too young and foolish then to listen.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
This is a popular food term that my S.O. has inwardly decided to never say aloud (a.k.a. a point-to-on-the-menu type of word).
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
For the last time: No, Dad, it’s not an “ ex-presso. ”
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Raise your hand if your parents will forever say “ knockie,” no matter how many times you correct them (my hand is raised).
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
You say " fuh "; I say "foe" — and I am horribly wrong.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
This may seem like a no-brainer, but I’ve heard my fair share of “ chee-poat-uls ” and “ chee-pot-lays. ” (I’m talking to you, Mom, and I'm cringing.)
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
As it turns out, it's not gy- as in jive -ro — and now I am filled with the overwhelming feeling that my life, up until this moment, has been a lie.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
I know what it means, but I have chosen never to speak it — because in my twisted mind it rhymes with bites.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Nope, it’s not " phooey grass. "
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Listen, you are not having a "fit," but you are paying a "fee" — noted.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Ghee as in geese, not “gee whiz!” as I had previously and inexplicably assumed...
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
There is an R in turmeric — and no, it is not silent.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
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